All honorable accumulation of power and love is based upon the principle of providing power and love to others, and receiving power and love in return. You must give before you can expect to receive, because a wood stove will never give you any heat until you at least put some wood into it first. As Robert Kiyosaki says in his book Rich Dad Poor Dad, “you must give whatever you wish to receive.” Give a smile, and you get a smile, give a slap in the face, and you get a slap in the face. When you give to others, they are in turn compelled to give back to you.
So how do you give them what they need? Here are some techniques:
Discover What They Need
Who is your target? Is it a group of people or a single person? If it is a group of people, try to get a sense of what elements they share in common. Either way, once you have chosen your target, figure out how they think and feel on a regular basis. What emotions do they regularly feel? What triggers these emotions? Put yourself in their shoes and observe and listen to them closely. This will help to give you a better sense of what they need. They may have a frustration or a problem that you can solve for them. They could just have a need that isn’t being sufficiently fulfilled. They could also have a goal that they would like to accomplish that you can help them out with. Figure out what it is that they need, and then get to work on finding out how you can fulfill that need.
Use Your Unique Abilities
We live in a world that is increasingly requiring more specialization and the more you can excel at what you’re naturally good at, the better. Some people like to call your unique abilities your “strengths” or your “natural talents”. Whatever you choose to call them, you need to find out what they are and then use them to give others what they need. Focus on using only your unique abilities to give them what they need, as opposed to doing things that you’re not really naturally good at, because using only your unique abilities will cause you to further develop these natural skills, and you will become even more valuable to the world because of your specialization.
Example - My Old Boss
I once had a boss I worked for who did not come across to me as very confident or secure. We had a friendly but slightly uneasy relationship in the beginning and I was never quite sure if he was satisfied with me or not as his employee. This had begun to make me a bit insecure about my work (I had been fired from a previous job for not showing up). I had recently thought about this concept of giving them what they need, and decided to apply it to my situation with my boss. I began by asking myself “What does he need?” It took me a while to figure it out, but eventually I came to the conclusion that he needed more respect and affirmation of his power. I then began to show him more respect in the way I interacted with him and our relationship improved dramatically. My boss began to treat me better than any of his other employees and he also began to honor almost every request I made regarding my work.
Now go out there and give, give, give!
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